Pace Yourself

04 Nov Pace Yourself

Daylights savings time has just begun.  The days seems so short and the evenings so long. We have to adjust our whole rhythm to this new scenario.  Family life is hectic and each day seems full.  As the autumn leaves come down, the weather becomes colder, we already feel the “stress” of Christmas as stores display decorations, advertisements prod us to get our gifts and the “to do” list of preparations invade our sub-conscious.

Whether you are a first time mom or a veteran mom of many, we all experience this overwhelming feeling of Christmas on the horizon. Children look forward to it with anticipation of all the joys they will soak in. Moms on the other hand feel the weight of responsibilities to make it a great family occasion.  It is so important that we pace ourselves and find ways to tackle our expectations. If we feel it is a major feat, we are overwhelmed.  Breaking it down into manageable chunks spread over several weeks makes a huge difference in what you can achieve as well as your level of serenity. Christmas is so much more than entertaining, food and gifts. We can get so carried away with these aspects that we miss or malnourish the deeper aspects that Christmas beckons us to.

It is worthwhile to get out a piece of paper and do a brain dump of all the aspects of Christmas you feel you must tackle this year. Absolutely unload it all onto paper in point form until you feel there is nothing more to address. That is such a great de-stressor and helps you think much more clearly.  Take a break and leave it there. Add to it if needed. At another moment when you have the energy, maybe in the morning after breakfast, look at it and put it in order of priority. Maybe you will strike things off your list this year because it is less essential because of existing circumstances. Give yourelf an idea of when you wish to tackle things:  first, second and so on until all have been addressed.  Some things can be started quite early in the season, other things closer to the actual date.   Next, take each item and brainstorm who could help, possible alternatives, steps involved. Most family members, given enough notice, will be happy to share the load if we approach them with cheerfulness and honesty. Otherwise, they just assume we continue doing everything for everyone with no issues. It is worwhile to constantly educate family members what we need for our own well being.  Finally earmark weekly goals on your calendar to evenly spread them out over the time ahead.  This process alone really reduces stress and helps us to focus on the here and now, rather than all that is looming on the unorganized horizon.

It is important to not compare yourself to others. The person you are as a new mom is different than what you will be five, ten, twenty years from now. Although you have great memories of how your mom may have done things, that was when she already invested years into reaching her level of achievement.  Do not carry the weight of unrealistic expectations on yourself. Take on only what you can actually and happily manage.  Realize too it is easier to grow in small increments.  Talk to your spouse to find the right balance in approach. Be creative in solving your needs. So many alternatives are available if we take the time to think about it. There is room for change, scope to decrease or increase so many variables.  By thinking and planning,  we save time, money and energy in reaching our goals. This should be done often over the years, as our families change, we age and our needs become different. Don’t feel locked into a set way. Talk to other women along the spectrum of life who can open you to different approaches. The important thing is to pace yourself so that you are realistic with who you are, your values and your energy reserves. Christmas is about Christ, Christ being born, His desire to be born in you. For that to happen, you need to slow down, open the door and let Him in. For Christians, this is essential. Don’t miss the boat by being too much in a hurry to get too much done in too little time. Pace yourself and keep your focus on what really matters.

Practical tips follow. For more reading…